History of Moonrover. Final part

Andrew Olekh
6 Min Read

In the second part of our story, we told you who Maragret Moonrover was confused with, and what a long way the dream of an office on the Moon has come, and now we will tell you how affiliate marketing was invented outside the earth’s atmosphere and how rebellious spirits and medieval counts sleeping in coffins contributed to this.


So, the heir of the Moon Rover family, Anthony Moon Rover IV, began working at NASA. It was at that time that the program for a flight to the moon was being developed. But because of a broken alarm, Anthony was unable to participate in the selection of mission participants, and instead of him they took Buzz Aldrin, who did not want to fly at all. The thing is that at that time Buzz had just started an affair with a girl and he was in love. Unfortunately, he had to leave his girlfriend for constant training, and then because of the flight. This is connected with the tragedy of his life. When Buzz was jumping on the Earth’s satellite, his girlfriend was just calling him to say that they were breaking up, but she did not catch him at home. Because of this, Buzz Aldrin, who now lives in our office on the moon, still considers her his girlfriend, and none of us have the strength to tell him the truth.


Anthony Moon Rover IV’s next flights to the moon took place in secret. He considered it a personal, even intimate activity and did not want to attract unnecessary attention. He really did not like that the first landing was broadcast on television, and he never watched the footage of the landing. However, he did not need it. In the twenty years that such terrible things were happening on planet Earth as Afro hairstyles, the disco craze, and then in the eighties the madness reached such limits that men began to roll up the sleeves of their jackets, and women put foam rubber on their shoulders to make them seem larger, Anthony moved the mansion of his ancestors to the Moon piece by piece.


In the early nineties, when the entire event of moving the building was completed, Anthony Moon Rover discovered that it had cost him a fortune. Being practically a beggar, he, like his distant ancestor, thought about a way to make money. It was very convenient that the Internet appeared at that time. Realizing that he could make good money on this, Anthony invented affiliate marketing to make a profit without leaving his home.


This path, however, was neither straight nor easy. Initially, Anthony Moonrover IV conceived the company as an advertising agency with a focus on design, but his friend Andy Warhol had already died by this time. And the most successful order was a lifetime delivery of pizza for one famous company. This turned out to be an unexpected success, the Ouija board inherited from Grandma Margaret was used as an ordinary kitchen table, and when too many uneaten pizza edges accumulated on it, it attracted the attention of the rebellious spirit of Edgar Allan Poe, who became the first employee of the company and its content manager.


Following this, Count Promotacula showed up in the office, who was brought along with the house in his “bed with a lid”, as he calls his coffin. His restless thirst for income became the beginning of the history of the company as we know it today.


Anthony Moonrover had many ups and downs ahead of him, including struggling with early dial-up modems, which made a different sound when connected on the moon, sighing and gasping like two tennis players in a drawn-out game, which led to constant awkwardness when connecting to the Internet. Then there was the selection and hiring of employees, and it must be admitted that not all personnel decisions were successful. For example, our staff astronomer has been successfully avoiding us for several months now, and no one has really understood why he is needed or what he does. The rebellious spirit of Edgar Allan Poe sometimes goes on strike, demanding more pizza toppings in payment for his work, and Count Promotacula sometimes goes too far in his thirst for income. But affiliate marketing has never been an easy thing, in this changing and raging world and our company still adheres to the principles laid down by Anthony Moonrover the First – wear a pith helmet, a mustache, hunt rhinoceroses and seek adventure. We have abolished the first three installations due to the demands of the times, and replaced adventures with high payments, but it does not matter, the main thing is to observe the spirit of the commandments, and not their literal meaning.

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